What came first, love or marriage?
February 11, 2016
If my best friend came up to me and told me she was engaged, my first thought would be, “are you fucking pregnant?”
It seems like more and more people these days are getting married younger and younger.
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, I’m sure at least one person on your newsfeed will be getting engaged. That person will probably be under 25. Hell, probably under 21.
I feel like I’m the odd girl out when it comes to my views on marriage.
My 10 year plan includes graduating college, getting a job, buying a car, buying a house—basically just getting my life together.
Getting married is not high-up on my list of priorities.
I mean, sure, one day I could picture myself married and possibly having kids, but I see that in my 30s. Although, I can also see myself being single at 35, living in New York, laying on my bed in my underwear and freelance writing for a newspaper. Yup, totally channeling my inner Carrie Bradshaw.
But even Carrie found her Mr. Big, and so what if she was 38 when she settled down?
I’m not saying everyone should wait until then, but I feel like that might be a better alternative to what people are doing nowadays.
Sixty percent of married couples between the ages of 20 and 25 end in divorce, according to National Center for Health Statistics.
Let’s all just ponder that for a second.
While we’re thinking about that, let’s also consider why people are getting married so young in the first place.
Unexpected pregnancy, military benefits, being completely infatuated with someone after only knowing them for two months. All reasons I’ve personally seen for walking down the aisle.
Now, I’m not saying that all people that get married young are stupid and will inevitably get divorced. Miracles do happen.
But so often we are reminded that young marriages are hard. Especially if the two have a kid together. You should be 100 percent sure you are ready before you commit your life to someone.
Live together. Date for a few years. Make sure you really know the person. Better yet, make sure you really know yourself.
People probably think I’m just a bitter single, writing about how I hate to see other people happy.
My boyfriend and I have been together for three years. And let me tell you, there is no way in hell I am ready to commit my life to that guy.
We’re both doing our own thing and living out our goals, and if in the end, we intertwine those lives together, great.
But I’m only 21-years-old. Your 20s are supposed to be your selfish years. Travel. Shop. Do things for yourself. Love will always find its way to you.
There is absolutely no rush to get hitched. This isn’t the 1950s.