Edith: I get it, having these rough relationships sucks. But, you just have to think of the motherly figures in your life – do you have a middle school teacher who went the extra mile for you? Or a friend who takes care of you while blackout drunk? Thank them next Mother’s Day.

Ethel: As someone who grew up with an absentee father, I understand completely. It’s never easy being in a non-nuclear family model. I generally used Father’s Day to thank my uncles for being a positive male role model, but nowadays, I just thank my mom and aunt. 

Edith: The day can just be used for thanking anyone who may have helped out one way or another. I thanked my professor for being very helpful and a great inspiration to my life. I do have a great relationship with my mother, however, it doesn’t just need to be a day for bio moms.

Ethel: Bottom line, I don’t think you are bitter. But also, I think there are plenty of ways to participate in Mother’s Day if you want to. But also, don’t be afraid to have it just be another day. 

Edith: Exactly. You’re not bitter, you’re just upset. And it’s okay to be upset. Relationships are tricky, scary and simply overwhelming. Don’t worry about it! If somebody asks you why you’re sad over Mother’s Day, just say it’s because you miss being with their mom.

Ethel: That’s the best “yo mama” joke I’ve heard in a hot minute. Alternatively, if you’re feeling up to it, you could tell people you don’t have the best relationship with your mom and watch them squirm as they try to pull their foot out of their mouth. 

Edith: You can answer in whatever mood you’re feeling up to, and make sure you take it easy for the day. Even if it’s “just a day,” if it’s taking a toll on you, make sure you’re grounding yourself and taking care. This “simple day” can be painful if you have a bad relationship with your mother or if she passed away, so don’t feel guilty!

Ethel: So, Emotionally Resigned, I hope this helps. You’re not bitter, and it’s valid to feel bummed about it. But there are also alternative ways to celebrate if you’re up for it!