BY SARAH RUIZ, Contributing Writer

What if we lived in a society where the rolls on my stomach mattered less than the dreams that I have?

What if our daughters grew up loving themselves instead of spending hours in front of a mirror, wishing for smaller thighs? What if the importance of our appearance came second to what makes us happy? I’ll tell you what would happen, we would live in a world that loved one another for more than just the number on a scale.

There are countless reasons that have led to a generation of girls who feel they can’t get thin enough, but I think one of the biggest problems we have is that we believe it’s okay to comment on someone’s weight.  Newsflash: It is never okay.

As long as I can remember, one of the first things I am asked about is my weight. I walk into a room of relatives I haven’t seen in a while, and everyone comments on my appearance. They throw out words without even thinking that, perhaps, yes, I had noticed the extra pounds I’d gained, but maybe I was okay with it. Instead, they say whatever makes them comfortable, whatever makes sense to them. By addressing my weight before they even know about my health or happiness, they are making it clear what matters most.

If we lived in a world where our standards actually reflected the average size 14 woman instead of models, maybe I wouldn’t spend valuable time thinking I wasn’t good enough. Or perhaps if we could just remember the Golden Rule — if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all, — we would have fewer people worrying about how they look.

Weight is a number on a scale that we obsess over. We worry if we gain an extra pound, never thinking that perhaps that pound reflects a hard few months at school or that we made it through a family disaster that made us skip the gym.

I’m not going to sit here and pretend that our weight isn’t tied to our health — I know it is. But the problem with society is that our questions and directed hurtful words about weight are typically not uttered with health in mind. The words that people speak to others are a simple reflection of society’s obsession with appearance. We think that if someone doesn’t look the way we want them to, it is okay to say something.

The truth of the matter is that weight does not mean the same to all people. Some of us love our bodies the way they are, and are okay with not looking like the “American standard.” But even the people who love their bodies, feel the hurt when someone points out their weight. It makes us question if we are only valuable by how our body looks or what size pant we can fit into. I am more than a number, and so is every other person in this world. So the next time you get confused and think it is your place to comment on someone’s weight, think again.

We live in a beautifully diverse and wonderful world. A world that has different cultures, averages and beliefs. So the next time my weight doesn’t fit in with your culture, your average or your belief, please consider that perhaps I am living in my own world — a world where I am wonderful just the way I am and a world where there is more to me than a number.